Those Enormous Breasts


It's that time of year again, a time when Defunct Games celebrates the holidays by posting a daily theme article that should inform and delight gamers all over the world. This year we're taking a look at the video game cliche, the type of thing we've seen time and time again in all generations of gaming. Is this cliche realistic? Does it need to go away? These are the types of questions Defunct Games will be asking over the next month. Join us as we celebrate this joyous season with the 34 Cliches of Christmas!



I suppose Dead or Alive is just following in the footsteps of Baywatch and other shows about busty women running on the beach!
As Seen In: Dead or Alive series, Tomb Raider, Ninja Gaiden, DOA Xtreme Beach Volleyball, Soul Calibur, BloodRayne, Sexy Beach 2, Fatal Fury, Leisure Suit Larry, Age of Conan, Tabula Rasa, and too many other D-cups to count (not that I wouldn't mind trying).

What Is It? I know I'm probably the first person to mention this, but women in video games tend to have enormous breasts. I'm not just talking about slightly larger than average, either. I'm talking about the kind of breasts that can hurt somebody if they aren't careful. The kind of breasts that require industrial strength bras. The kind of breasts that give you cleavage that goes for miles and miles. That's right; video game women have enormous breasts. And it's not just that they have these ridiculously huge breasts, it's the kinds of clothing they decide to put on. Take Ninja Gaiden as an example, from time to time a busty fighter named Rachel will show up to taunt our hero Ryu Hayabusa. While she has a few good lines and shows up just in time to help Ryu, Rachel has one (well, two) thing that sets her apart - her enormous rack. And in case you didn't notice her 36F cup breasts, Tecmo goes one step further by having her fight in a revealing bra. And if that wasn't enough, you also see her all oiled up and shiny. If you've played games for any amount of time then chances are this description doesn't affect you much, but to those who are just now starting to play games or are just looking in, the idea of this practically naked woman fighting alongside Ryu may be a bit jarring. Then again, if you're a hormonal teenage boy then chances are this is probably your favorite video game cliche.

Is It Realistic? Look, I get it; there are some women that are more, um, blessed than others. It's a fact of life that some women have enormous breasts, I certainly can't find fault in that. However, the average bra size is 36C (according to the Vanderbilt University), which is a far cry from what we're seeing in a lot of modern games. But this isn't about whether there are women who have enormous breasts; instead it's about who these women are, what they are doing and what they are wearing. Generally speaking you don't see these large breasted women taking down criminals and street fighting in real life. Instead you see them in bikini ads and in pornography. And even if you do see a chesty woman rush into a fight, she's

Okay, I understand the huge breasts, some women are just chesty. But what I don't understand is the oil. Is the oil really necessary?
usually wearing something more than a revealing shirt that barely keeps the girls from being exposed. But then again, no matter the breast size, women should be able to do just about anything seen in these video games (within reason, of course). But I suspect that pretty much everybody would agree that video games tend to portray women in an unrealistic light that mainly focuses in on their chest and skimpy outfits. That's good for the teenage male audience they are targeting, but definitely not very realistic.

Is It Overused? Before I get myself into too much trouble, I certainly don't want to be the person that says you shouldn't put busty women in video games. I'm a pretty average guy, I certainly like looking at women's breasts and don't find anything offensive about seeing them in bikini tops and other cute clothes. But that doesn't mean every female character needs to be overtly sexual, sometimes it's nice to see a realistic woman show up. And by realistic I mean a girl that is kind of short and a little chunky. Or maybe we shouldn't go for realism, since there are plenty of games that portray men as nothing but football player-sized muscle machines who look like they're on a steady dose of steroids. I don't find that very realistic, but I'm sure there are gamers out there that don't mind looking at some dude's six-pack as they beat up bad guys and save the world. Different strokes for different folks, I guess.