The Wolfenstein series has had a checkered past when it comes to Commercial Break. Back in episode 10 (see: Bad Advertising: Guatemala) we were the first to point out the blatant racism in the advertising, and then 17 episodes later we checked out the Super NES version of Wolfenstein 3D (see: Rockstar: Bad Advertising). Well, it's back. Except we're done (for now) bashing on Wolfenstein 3D, instead we plan on going further back in time and taking our revenge on Castle Wolfenstein.

So this is an advertisement for Castle Wolfenstein, brought to us from Muse Software. This is the Apple II version of the game (a "sight and sound extravaganza") that takes up a whopping 48K of space. And you can tell they mean business, because Muse decided to limit the colors to white, black and blue. Apparently Muse Software decided that the Castle Wolfenstein they wanted people to get to know was the one where you tiptoe through spooky stairs. Most companies would have tried to make Castle Wolfenstein look extremely exciting (with bullets being shot and bodies piling up), Muse Software opted to go a decidedly different route.

My problem with this new direction is that it doesn't make a lot of sense. Wolfenstein has always been about fast action and shooting people. This advertisement makes it look like our "hero" is afraid of that treasure chest, which doesn't make the game look like fun at all. How could this guy be our hero? This guy is afraid of his own shadow, so what's he doing fronting an action game? Throw caution to the wind dude, because you're fighting the Nazis and they don't have time for your indecision. Straighten up your back and run out in to the fray, kill some of those bastards and show them what you're here for. Or you can just be afraid in the corner, the choice is yours. Wuss.

FROM: The Whitest Bad Advertising U Know