Sometimes when I rip apart a video game advertisement I feel bad. I know that deep down there was some low-paid artist spending his lonely, loveless nights scribbling up what he thinks is an epic illustration for SNK or Streets of Rage. But I don't have a problem making fun of the Double Dragon trilogy on the Nintendo Entertainment System (and Game Boy). By the time we arrived at this advertisement Acclaim had already milked the franchise dry, the only thing worse would have been teaming them up with the Battletoads ... oh wait. Regardless of what you think of Double Dragon, I think everybody would agree that this franchise is not above taking a few well placed hits.

So this is a Double Dragon explosion ... ewww! Apparently this is the story where Billy and Jimmy take on Scorpion, who has turned the entire city upside down. No really, look at what's going on behind our heroes. We have a dozen people punching, kicking and choking to get ahead. And yet our heroes refuse to do anything about it. Instead they stand there posing for the camera. Uh, guys, there's some action going on right behind you, maybe you should save the photo op for that victory lap you'll do right after kicking everybody else's ass.

Oh, and this should be common sense, but if you're a wanted felon, then maybe you shouldn't stand in front of your own wanted poster. I know the Double Dragon boys are not the sharpest saws in the tool shed, but you don't see real criminals doing this, do you? I mean, when was the last time you heard about one of the FBI's most wanted getting nabbed because he couldn't resist posing in front of his wanted poster? You don't hear about that, because it doesn't happen. Then again, if the Double Dragons were actually smart they would quit posing and run away from whatever is going on in the background, because that looks mighty nasty!

FROM: She's Got the Bad Advertising