Oh no, Maria's in trouble ... somebody needs to save her!! Wait, I have an idea, let's head over to the local nightclub and find somebody that will save her, the type of hero that will know how to get the job done. But who do you pick? The bar manager? Nah, he's too busy keeping the conversations flowing. How about choosing the bouncers? After all, these burly guys are paid to look mean and intimidate, and they almost always get the job done. But we can't use them; they're already busy breaking up fights. Oh wait, I know, let's choose the DJ ... after all, it's not like anybody is going to miss him!

This must have been the thinking when Kaneko decided to make DJ Boy. They could have chosen the go-go dancers, the wait staff, the bartender, or even the people on the floor getting drunk and dancing ... but they chose the DJ. The DJ, the one guy whose only job seems to be taking song requests and making sure he doesn't get too drunk to push the play button. Perhaps it's the stupid choices like that which kept Kaneko from putting their name on this advertisement.

Also, did I miss the trend of DJs and roller skates?? Since when was it hip for DJs to skate around? I thought that's what waitresses did in 1950s pull-up burger joints. And Kaneko, are you sure this DJ was the best choice?? He's wearing green pants and a matching shirt. A MATCHING SHIRT!! And to make matters worse, he's wearing elbow and knee pads, just like all the cool kids do. What's going on here? Couldn't you find a geekier DJ to base your character around? Who is this guy, DJ Pocket Protector?? Maria, I hope you're making the best of your new surroundings because I have a hunch it's going to be a long time before anybody comes and rescues you (and when they do, boy are you going to be disappointed).

FROM: My Bad Advertising on the D-List