Cruel Bands Career

If you've seen even one biopic about a famous band, then you already know all the cliches. You've seen their early beginnings, that amazing moment when they hear their song on the radio, the rampant drug problems and then the world-shattering concert that shows them at the height of their power. The new game Cruel Bands Career bucks all the tropes to show you a very different side of the music business. It's a weird puzzle/tower defense hybrid that throws just about everything at our three-piece band. And by everything, I mean adoring fans, angry men, space aliens, ghosts, demonic ghouls and even the scary little girl from The Ring. Now that is a recipe for a great music biopic.

Cruel Bands Career is a baffling game. While most bands are in search of fame and fortune, the three members in this game are on a secret mission. Or, at least, that's what the description tells us, because there's a lot about the story and premise that is purposely vague. The idea is to rock out through six harrowing locations full of fans, foes and freaky monsters. It's the type of game where getting drunk is a good thing and nobody is going to get mad if the guitarist falls asleep for a few minutes.

The best way to describe Cruel Bands Career is as a weird mash-up that combines Plants vs. Zombies with Rock, Paper, Scissors. The idea is that people will charge the rotating stage in three different lines, each with a different result. For example, the sexy women that make it to the stage will give that musician health, but at the same time take away health for the jealous bandmates. The fighter, on the other hand, just wants to punch somebody, all while the smelly fan will drain the rocker's health if they aren't paying attention. And this is all before the aliens, ghosts and monsters show up.

The trick is to rotate the stage so that you're letting the right band member deal with the right audience member. This balancing act is not as easy as it sounds, because so much of what happens to one character impacts what happens to the rest of the band. You'll quickly discover that sometimes a member will need to take the hit for the good of the group, so a lot of the challenge comes down to strategically balancing the three musician's health bar. If one of those bars depletes, then that rocker explodes and the band is forced to leave the stage. Y'know, just like in real life.

The fun of the game is discovering how you can use the different side effects against the more dangerous audience members. There are times when you'll purposely dizzy one of your band members, because that means that the next person they come in contact with will have the opposite effect. Similarly, putting on the VR goggles will make it so the next person you run into might as well not even be there, and the musicians that fall asleep during the show will completely ignore anybody that approaches the stage, including those angry punching men. So much of this game is about learning how to deal with each type of fan, all while making sure that everybody has enough health to make it to the boss fight.

Thankfully, our rockin' trio has a few tricks up their sleeves that will make completing their special mission a little easier. They'll increase their combo meter for each audience member they interact with, which will allow them to unleash a powerful special move that will clear out the room. There are also power-up items players can snag mid-level, which usually come in the form of food, alcohol or some sort of throwing weapon. And finally, the band will be able to choose between three perks at the end of every level, all of which will stay activated until the player runs out of lives and starts over from the beginning.

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But even with these special abilities and power-ups, Cruel Bands Career is a challenging game. In fact, I'm not going to sugar coat it, this game is tough. I'm not afraid to admit that it took me a few hours to wrap my head around all the enemies and items. It didn't make a lot of sense for a long time, and even when it all click for me, I found the balancing act to be overwhelming in the later stages. I could never shake the feeling that I was missing an important detail that would make the experience so much easier. It was like playing the guitar with two missing strings.

The problem I kept running into wasn't the difficulty, but rather the repetition. Because of the way the game is structured, every playthrough of Cruel Bands Career has a bad habit of feeling the same. This isn't helped by the limited soundtrack. In fact, I found it a little disappointing that the music didn't play more of a role. The game spends so much time with the audience that the music is little more than an afterthought.

On the other hand, I like the clean black and white look and comic book influence. Even though there are only a few locations to play in, it's clear that the artists had fun coming up with new and creative audience members to populate each venue. The songs may not be very memorable, but I have a hunch the enemy designs are going to stick with me for years to come. Some of them are truly horrifying.

Although punishingly difficult, Cruel Bands Career offers a unique take on the tower defense genre. This weird and often baffling game is all about dealing with the audience members, no matter if they're friendly, angry or demonic monsters. The result is an addictive and good-looking mix of Plants vs. Zombies and Rock, Paper, Scissors, complete with crazy power-ups and epic boss fights. It's hard and the music is an afterthought, but Cruel Bands Career is so over-the-top that I can't help but recommend it.