Horatio Goes Snowboarding
Reviewed by Cyril Lachel on
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Barebones to a fault, Horatio Goes Snowboarding is a white-knuckle race down a relentlessly difficulty mountain. The accessible gameplay and fast-paced action helps make this game a perfect time-waster when all you have are a few minutes, but don't expect much depth here. The tedious stage designs, repetitive obstacles and missing customization options keep this extreme sports game grounded. Fun in short bursts, but lacking a lot of the options and modes we take for granted. Oh well, at least it's better than Slalom.
Rating: 57%
From Duck Hunt to Ice Climber to Mach Rider, there are a lot of early Nintendo Entertainment System games I wouldn't mind seeing given the 21st century treatment. Pretty low on that list, however, has to be Slalom, the frustratingly difficult skiing game that hasn't aged well in the last 35 years. But could it be that I have been wrong this whole time? That's how I felt while playing through a fun and addictive new game called Horatio Goes Snowboarding. It's a downhill delight that is both fast-paced and nerve-racking in all the best ways, giving us a modern-day Slalom that is actually fun. But for how long? That's the question we're going to answer today.
You play a gumball-shaped character named Horatio who knows exactly what he needs to do: Buy a board and hit the slopes. Like the title suggests, Horatio is about to go snowboarding, and it's your job to make sure he gets to the bottom without hitting a tree or missing too many of the gates. The goal is to spend as many days in a row hitting the slopes and earning a high score, which you'll use to impress the leaderboard and, more importantly, unlock the unlimited mountain mode.
As you can imagine, successfully getting to the bottom of the mountain is not always as easy as it sounds. Horatio will obviously need to avoid trees, barrels, rocks and the typical snowboarding obstacles, as well as a few surprises, such as a Yeti racing after our hero and knocking everything over that gets in his way. The randomly constructed stages get increasingly challenging and more congested as the days go on, making it harder for you to keep the point multiplier going and our rotund hero from falling on his face.
If Horatio does end up hitting a tree or getting clobbered by the Yeti, he'll be rushed to the hospital and forced to pay a one-hundred pound fee and buy a new snowboard before being allowed back on the slopes. That may not sound so bad, but remember that you only start with three hundred pounds in your pocket. Even if you manage to earn some extra cash for successfully getting to the finish line, all it will take is a few crashes before the game is over and your score is set in stone.
And it's not always the mountain you have to worry about, because just getting to the helicopter plays out like a high-stakes version of Frogger. Horatio will need to dodge cars and trucks as he crosses several lanes of traffic in an effort to get to the chopper. That's usually no problem, but there were plenty of times when I misjudged my timing and sent the poor guy back to the emergency room. There's nothing worse than getting hit by a car in a snowboarding game.
The best thing I can say about Horatio Goes Snowboarding is that it's easy to pick up and immediately fun. Yes, it sometimes feels like the game is working against you, but that's half the charm. This isn't a serious snowboarding simulator where realism counts; it's a silly time-waster where you move left and right dodging trees and passing through gates. It's a game you'll play for a few minutes in an attempt to hit a new high score. It works as a simple quick-play game, but the moment you start hoping for a little depth is when the whole thing falls apart.
I'm honestly a little surprised by how barebones Horatio Goes Snowboarding is. It's not that I expected more to the course designs or a robust story mode, but I figured we would at least get some customization. A lot of these types of games have you earning money to unlock new outfits, colors, snowboards, goggles, you name it. This one, however, does not. Unless I missed a crucial part of the experience, I was always the same purple gumball with a yellow snowboard. The game loses something by not having missions to complete and items to unlock. It desperately needs that carrot and stick to keep you invested in the action, because trying to beat your high score won't be enough for most people.
I am also not a big fan of the art style, which is a little too simplistic and repetitive for its own good. The only visual difference between runs is the time of day, which offers a nice splash of color here and there. Aside from that, pretty much every time down the mountain looks the same. It's always the same obstacles and paths, to the point where it almost doesn't feel random anymore. It doesn't help that you can't pull off any tricks or do anything to make the slopes more interesting. About the closest you get to a stunt is narrowly missing a tree. The game likes to label that "showboating," but I prefer to call it desperately staying invested in this shallow experience.
Like I said earlier, this is the kind of game that is fun in short bursts. The controls may be simple and the game is too barebones, but you'll certainly have a good time for a few minutes. The problem is that without stunts, rotating tasks and customization options, the fun is limited and good times are short-lived. Horatio Goes Snowboarding is exactly what it sounds like, and nothing more.
Barebones to a fault, Horatio Goes Snowboarding is a white-knuckle race down a relentlessly difficulty mountain. The accessible gameplay and fast-paced action helps make this game a perfect time-waster when all you have are a few minutes, but don't expect much depth here. The tedious stage designs, repetitive obstacles and missing customization options keep this extreme sports game grounded. Fun in short bursts, but lacking a lot of the options and modes we take for granted. Oh well, at least it's better than Slalom.
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