A lot has changed since the last time we featured an episode of the Cover Critic. Both Sony and Nintendo have released new portable game systems, long time companies have shut their doors forever, and the world has been reintroduced to a certain lawyer named Jack Thompson. Heck, even this site you're looking at has changed in many ways. So maybe it's time we take another serious look at video game covers, letting you know which ones we like and which we hate. After two years I invite you to embrace a brand new Cover Critic, one that isn't afraidto tell you what we really think. So enjoy five new covers and one new look!
*NSync: Get to the Show
Oh dear god ... why on Earth would I even consider this as a reviewable cover? Because this game pretty much sums up what the Game Boy Color has become. I don't know how to play this N'Sync game, I haven't even seen the back of the box ... I just know that this is ALL WRONG. How wrong. This is wrong on just about every level!! And this cover is one of the worst I've seen. Look, it's something to keep your 13 year old sister happy. Thankfully you can throw the game away.
Final Fantasy X
This cover isn't perfect, but it's much better than Sqaure's worst Final Fantasy covers (Final Fantasy IX, anybody?). This cover introduces the consumer to Tidus, a funny looking athelete with a real flame for Blitzball. Oh sure, it's a nice picture, and it's full of promise of a new land, but it's taken straight out of the game. I know it's asking too much to create a new illustration for the box, but at least give us something new. All things considered, though, this is a much better example of a cover than that N'Sync stuff.
Hoshigami
Here's a game that just kind of game out of nowhere ... it's Hoshigami, and you're likely to look right past it unless you're careful. I really like the anime look of this box, and the white hays works well. But what is this? Is it a role playing game? Is it a strategy game? It could even be a shooter ... frankly, I can't tell! There's one other thing I don't understand, why does Atlus' watermark clash so much with box? No matter, this is probably the best box cover on this page!!
Simpsons Road Rage
Just as N'Sync belongs in the middle schools, the Simpsons belong on TV (or DVD). The Simpsons have not only made for one bad game, but numerous bad games in a number of genres. Road Rage is pretty much exactly like it sounds, the Simpsons meets Crazy Taxi. The cover doesn't make me laugh, it doesn't make me excited to play, and it doesn't give hope for the quality of the software. Perhaps this picture would be funnier with the injection of sound, so, I give you this: "aaaaahhhhhh!!"
Universal Park Tour
What do Jurassic Park, ET, and Back to the Future have in common? They're all better movies than video games. Who was the marketting exec who came up with this cover?? The only thing uglier than an interactive amusement park game is this cut and paste box art. This is something I could have banged out in only a few minutes. Hmm, perhaps I've said too much.
