Welcome to Great Moments in GamePro, the show where we chronicle the silliest, craziest, punniest and most baffling GamePro quotes of all time. In this episode, we're going to continue our trek through the year 1991 with a look at the May, June and July issues, featuring legitimate classics like Sonic the Hedgehog, Double Dragon III, Power Blade, VICE: Project Doom, Valis II and the Genesis version of Batman. So get those fancy shoes ready, because we're about to induct a few of the Great Moments in GamePro.


S.C.A.T. (NES): "No doubt about it, S.C.A.T. looks, sounds and plays like a winner from beginning to end. Although it isn't as long as some games, it will take hours of practice to finally flush Malmort and company back to the intergalactic cesspool. Space monsters sneaking around your backyard? Just say, 'S.C.A.T.'"

Ikari III: The Rescue (NES): "Remember when you breezed through Ikari 1 with the continue code and decided the game wasn't worth more than a rental? In Ikari III, you get unlimited continues from the spot where you perish, so you may reach a similar conclusion. It's a fairly fun two-player contest, but only the first trip through. After that, this game is as dry as the Sahara Desert."

Golden Axe Warrior (SMS): "Golden Axe Warrior is a great game that will cause adventure buffs, maze freaks and hack 'n slashers to do some serious (but satisfying) headbanging. Just when you think you've had it, you discover a secret room that compels you to continue. Got an axe to grind? Go for Golden Axe Warrior."

Valis II (TurboGrafx-CD): "Valis scores high in most respects, but the overall challenge for anyone experienced with video blades is average. Just the same, Valis II is both a good animated adventure and a pretty good action game. CD or not CD."

Hellfire (Genesis): "Hellfire's basic features don't soar above other space shooters; however, we'll still send out a scramble to Genesis space aces: Beat this cart to really earn your wings! If you're looking for a pure outer space shooter that you'll love to hate, go to Hellfire."

Tail Gator (Game Boy): "Any true game player will enjoy this musical, fantasy adventure cart. Until next time, remember if Gator's got you stumped, don't use your head -- use your tail!"

Double Dragon III (NES): "If you've mastered the first two Double Dragon carts then you must tackle this one, too, but be forewarned: The knuckle-busting gets pretty dirty. It's the law of the video jungle: Beat or be beaten."

Sword Master (NES): "The fact that you only get five lives to complete the game makes it a practically impossible quest. The title says it all: Sword Master is for sword masters."

Base Wars (NES): "As a multiplayer game, Base Wars really excels. It's a nice mix of baseball and battling -- you never get tired of kicking the other guy's can -- literally!"

StormLord (Genesis): "Three cheers for a hack and slash cart that features action-packed gameplay where you use your mind as well as your controller to achieve ultimate victory. Original gameplay bolstered by gorgeous graphics and nifty sound effects should enable this cart to take gamers by storm!"

Cyraid (Game Boy): "This excellent cart is a brain teaser that's a real pleaser. You'll enjoy working your way through Cyraid, but set aside a chunk of time, it's a mother."

VICE: Project Doom (NES): "Actually Vice is more than nice -- it's superb. The intriguing story sequences keep you interested, and the excellent action keeps you on your toes. If it seems easy at first, hang in there -- there are enough challenges to make Vice a good habit."

Sonic the Hedgehog (Genesis): "Sonic the Hedgehog is a class act all the way. It shows what determined programmers, artists and game designers can do when they really set out to produce a winner. Don't hedge your bets on Sonic the Hedgehog."

Bugs Bunny Crazy Castle II (Game Boy): "With smooth animation, good fun and lively action, Bugs Bunny on the Game Boy is actually better than the NES version. And th ... th ... th ... that's all, folks."

Crystal Mines II (Lynx): "Crystal Mines II is a good-looking, fun game for a skill level that will definitely give you your money's worth. It calls for intense concentration and pre-planning, but if you get stuck, you can always jump to a new challenge on another level. One thing's certain, you'll really 'dig' this game!"

Power Blade (NES): "This is an excellent action cart that you'll replay again and again. Two skill levels, sector time limits, passwords, unlimited continues, and the ability to play sectors in any order keep the fun flowing. Stay sharp for Power Blade."

Batman (Genesis): "Batman doesn't throw anything new at you, but even though you may have done it all before, it's never looked this good. Even the music and sounds stand out. Batman's a winner. Has the Joker finally had his last laugh? We hope not."

Alien Storm (Genesis): "Alien Storm mimics the arcade version perfectly. You get a great variety of easy-to-do moves, and there's never a dull moment. The simultaneous two player function in particular is outrageous fun! Don't let the Aliens take the Earth by storm."

Ninja Taro (Game Boy): "If you're looking for a rousing adventure story, take on Ninja Taro. You'd best be prepared to log some hefty Game Boy time, but it's fun to visit old Japan and lose yourself in Taro's challenging quest. This ninja cart deserves to come out of the shadows."

Who Framed Roger Rabbit (Game Boy): "A game for all ages, Who Framed Roger Rabbit is a clever and entertaining whodunnit that's challenging enough to keep you interested without causing you to rip out your hare."

Sneaky Snakes (Game Boy): "Sneaky Snakes is a hilarious adventure cart with truly unique heroes. It's a guaranteed snake charmer for all ages."

And while you're just clicking on stuff at random, I suggest you head over to the Defunct Games YouTube page and subscribe to the channel. We're posting new episodes of Game Over: The Early Years every Monday, along with brand new game reviews throughout the week.