Before there was Worms there was Body Blows, Team 17's bizarre action game. At least, I think it's an action game. I'll be honest with you, thanks to my rather limited exposure to the Amiga I have never actually played Body Blows or its sequel, Body Blows Galactic. After looking at this ridiculous cover art I'm actually a little bummed that playing Body Blows Galactic is not something I look back to fondly. Judging from the box art this game has everything ... well, everything except a background. Seriously guys, what happened to the background? I know this wasn't before the era of locations, so what's the big idea? Are they fighting in space? If that's the case then why isn't everybody floating (or dying)? And if they are in space then how is there a fire monster attacking them? Oh, this stuff boggles the mind.

Let's forget the lack of backgrounds for a minute and focus on these four (well, five) bad guys. Assuming these are the big bad guys in Body Blows Galactic, we have a demon made of fire, a Xena-like woman riding what looks like a poker chip, some dude in a trench coat and a T-Rex (with a smaller dinosaur of some sort). Okay, I'm stumped, I don't see a connection between these four ... well, outside of them all sucking. How on earth are you going to fight a fire monster? You're just two dudes with your hands; I don't see a fire extinguisher laying around anywhere. And what's up with the woman on the flying coin. If you've mastered the art of flying, then why not give that ability to something more comfortable ... like a boat or car or something. And then there are the dinosaurs, which clearly didn't get the memo that they've been dead for millions of years. The only one that is even remotely scary looking is the dude in the trench coat, and that's only because we don't know what he looks like. Who knows, maybe if we saw his face we would be surprised to find a six foot tall Tickle Me Elmo. Man, talk about scary.