You just spent the last 48 hours analyzing that confusing Lost diagram, stood in line to buy sushi at Wal-Mart, and was named the Sexiest Woman Alive. It sounds like you just barely survived March 2006, a month that brought us Naomi Cambell arrest, millions of drunk college kids, and a sequel to Basic Instinct! But don't worry Andy Card and Issac Hayes, the fact that you quit your job just means that you'll finally have more time to play all of those new Xbox 360 games worth buying! But just because the month is coming to an end doesn't mean you have to stop partying, I give you Defunct Games' RECAPPED!! for March 2006. We're taking a look back at all of the stuff you loved, a few of the things you hated, and even some crap you forgot about! This is a sugar free look back at the month that brought Marlon Brando's much anticipated video game debut! Oh what a month. So don't miss anything as we count down the five best articles of 2006, one of the best months we've had!
Why This Article?
It's not what you might consider a traditional article, but there's no denying that our brand new redesign is the single best thing about March 2006! After five years of suggestions, a lot of brainstorming and some dumb luck, Defunct Games is back with a fancy new look that officially brings us into the 21st century. Not only is it a better looking site, but it's also more useful. We've listened to every complaint about the old site and turned it into something we are all very proud of.
But no matter how good it looks, it's still not an article. If we're going to reward the best articles on Defunct Games shouldn't we at least deal with the projects that involve some kind of writing? Well if that's how you're going to be about it, then why not read a few of the articles made specifically for the new look. There's What the Hell is Defunct Games, a handy guide for anybody new to the site. And if that's not enough, there's also a handy Letter from the Editor which addresses all of the new features and bonuses that can be found on Defunct Games. Sure it's not a traditional article, but it's a damn fine improvement and that's why we consider it the best of March 2006!
Post-Article Thoughts:
"No matter who you are, it's a fact of business that you need to freshen things up every few years. It had been two years since Defunct Games had done any kind of overhaul, so we were due for a facelift. But while this new site looks great (much better than the old site, if you ask me), it's far from done. In the weeks leading up to Defunct Games we will be retrofitting nearly every page on the site! And there's more, if you're a subscriber to Defunct Games Expansion Pack you will get even more out of the site. Change the colors, track the articles, take part in blog talkbacks, and level your user name up. But even if this redo hasn't crossed the finish line yet, we're still proud enough of the new look to reward it with our coveted Article of the Month award!"
-Cyril Lachel
Why This Article?
Some love it, others hate it. Our PSP Report Card decided it was too tempting to make the games-as-school metaphor. It's My So-Called Portable Console, a report card that looks at all four quarters (er, semesters) of the Sony PlayStation Portable. Find out when the system was a the head of the class, learn why it got an F, and see how it fought back to produce a few interesting projects. But don't be fooled by the name, our PSP Report Card is not a system war. This is a fair look at the highs and lows of the PSP. This is not an article that is anti-DS or pro-PSP; it's just a fun look at one year's worth of learning in the school of hard knocks. This is not your traditional Defunct Games article ... and that's why we love it!
Post-Article Thoughts:
"At first it may seem odd for a site like Defunct Games to even talk about the PSP. The PlayStation Portable is the furthest thing from the WonderSwan or Neo Geo Pocket Color; most people might not expect an interest in a site that prides itself on Virtual Boy reviews. But that could not be farther from the truth. Sure Sony is a huge company, but they are also another one of many companies that have gone up against Nintendo. Chances are the PSP won't be abandoned like the Lynx or the Game Gear, but as a fan of watching how the industry works, I am just fascinated by the idea of a large company going up against Nintendo's unstoppable portable machine. Plus it makes for a funny article that you either love or hate."
-Cyril Lachel
Why This Article?
Would you believe that this episode of the Commercial Break is the very first one of our regular shows to make it on this list? Fun-Filled Days of Bad Advertising is yet enough stellar episode of the Commercial Break, featuring a Super Hunchback, a violent basketball game, and one terrible CD-i advertisement! And that's not all; in this Commercial Break we rip apart the idea of combining Scrabble with Tetris! And for all you Defunct Games historians out there, this is the first Commercial Break to lack a television reference (the title is a parody of, Fun-Filled Days of Harriet Knight, a popular radio show).
Post-Article Thoughts:
" When you have an article that looks at Super Hunchback you know it's going to be listed as one of the best articles of the month! The moment I saw that advertisement while digging through my old magazines I knew I had to add it to the Commercial Break. And sure enough, it created quite a stir. Believe it or not, a lot of people thought I made it up. But all it takes is one quick search of GameFAQs and you'll see that it was indeed a real game. Not a real good game, but a game nonetheless. With a site overhaul and a PSP retrospective, this is a tough month for our regular shows. But this Commercial Break proves that it can make even the most cynical gamer laugh!"
-Cyril Lachel
Why This Article?
There have been a lot of video game magazines in the past 17 years, but only Electronic Gaming Monthly and GamePro have had the staying power to hit 200 issues. Defunct Games couldn't let that pass by; it was our job to figure out which one was better. Would it be EGM with its generally high quality and unique articles, or GamePro, a magazine we're constantly making fun of? Well, let's just put it this way, GamePro was pretty close! If you're looking for an article that dissects two magazines at the top of their game, then I suggest you watch us duke it out over the Final Battle Over Issue 200!
Post-Article Thoughts:
"The Final Battle Over Issue 200 was the very first article created specifically for Defunct Games' new look. Of all the possibilities, it seemed like this review of EGM and GamePro's 200th issue was the most appropriate thing for a site about to hit its five year mark. This ended up being a controversial article; I personally received a number of emails arguing some of my findings. While I stand by the article, I have to say that it was a close call and a big part of me wants to say that GamePro had the better year. Either way, it made for the fun kind of article you never see on other sites."
-Cyril Lachel
Why This Article?
Not only is this our second PSP-related article this month, but it's the second PSP-related article on this list! But hopefully you'll forgive us, because it was the PSP's birthday after all. Regardless of whether you own Sony's portable PlayStation or not, GamePro's Letter Writing Campaign should appeal to everybody. It's the story of a magazine that would rather fling mud at the PSP than look at the games coming out for it; constantly reporting misinformation and completely ignoring big titles. This is not a story that tries to prove a GamePro bias, but rather bring to your attention that sometimes you don't need to repeat the same complaints every month. This controversial article rounds out the list of our favorite articles of March, and for good reason!
Post-Article Thoughts:
"Like the PSP or don't, but no system should have to put up with a magazine spreading misinformation. My concern is not whether GamePro likes the PSP, that's not important to me. But GamePro goes one step further; they ignore big releases and then say nothing is coming out. More than half a year later GamePro has still failed to talk about a number of the big titles that came out of 2005's Tokyo Game Show, including Loco Roco and Extreme Ghouls N Ghosts."
-Cyril Lachel
